Sound Before Echo
For most of my life, I tried to find myself in stories.
Then something shifted.
I stopped looking for my life in them—and started seeing them in me.
Life is given. Wisdom is how we live it.
Seeing through the illusion — works that reveal hidden systems, deconstruct performance, and open new sight.
For most of my life, I tried to find myself in stories.
Then something shifted.
I stopped looking for my life in them—and started seeing them in me.
Power moves in three ways—receiving, taking, and giving.
But what holds them reveals who we are.
Wonder can open us—or keep us at a distance.
This reflection explores the difference between wonder as escape and wonder as encounter,
and how learning to tell the difference changes everything.
This spark surfaced while I was serving as lector during worship, reading 1 Samuel 16:1–13 aloud.
Awakening often feels like a curse before it becomes wisdom. Ignorance can feel peaceful, knowledge can feel heavy, and only through acceptance do we learn how to live gently with what we see.
I’ve been thinking about performance anxiety lately—not as something to fix,
but as something to listen to.
This is not a religious argument.
It’s a human one.
It’s about how we learned to live at scale,
what that cost us,
and the one human life that showed what we lost.
It’s also about how that life found me again.
How a tattoo taught me systems, drift, and the beginning of my discernment.
A reflection on what happens when a life stretches beyond its natural shape — and the quiet grace of returning to the river you really are.
What started as a curiosity about meme culture carried me back to rupture, to grace, to Christ,
and to the simple, sacred decision to be. Always.